Poised

In quiet contemplation I sit at this spot

Only a scant two years I sat also in this very spot

In silent wonder in the dark of my new space

Overlooking the cold winter skeletons

The trees across the river

Wondering the place fate has taken me

And wondering where it would take me next

I gave myself anew that cold lonely night

Poised to try all I could and whither it takes me

To where ever destiny would wander me next

Yes I have been in love and found love

And yes love rejected me in all its forms

Or rather perhaps I frightened it off

Being the difficult friend and village idiot

These qualities forever to barrier my trials

I left open all doors in folly hopes

I stare at wisps of steam and gassy smoke

Signals of residents warm in their places

And families in joy and laughter so I imagine

Lo I could find the one to build this life

Imagined and real perhaps or illusion

Then she comes once and twice

A perfect woman frustrating and aware

Right there for me to share should we win

Heart for heart we part and part

Leaving doors open to find our ways home

You are real I say not knowing how I know

You are real a surprise to have met and found

And we turn apart to return a part

Of a whole found and renewed

A fork in this road is reached

We must decide

I love you

Pact poised to real future

You are real

As am I

stitch

i saw an end today so it was a sad ending but not so sad as to not invoke hope into an insight into my future driven by emotions emoted into psyche demoted to misunderstood understandings of intensive intensions shattered to pieces by normal behaviors of the abnormal behaviorist in the normal course of dissertation unfelt now felt in relief relieved as layers of painted new found colors result in changes longitude to latitude with coordinates set laser sharp to the global point a friend indeed is found with love devotion connection genuine in a life is asked as a life is offered our lives connected for a happiness a joy is found in one in knowing circumference will meet kin to greet the life fully lived with memory connection all encompassed shorn torn sewn joined whole anew

My Mundane

Starts are almost always same

My mundane

The alarm sits in hopeful wait

To rudely shake me from slumber

And then drops to silent disappointment

When I wake ahead of the blare

I stare at the numbers

And with a flick

The switch

"Missed it by that much"

Says 86 the clock brain

I smile my mundane

Legs are tested

Do they work

Aged pain as blood recourses

The zombie walk to plop in this desk seat

And put life back to these screens and drives

A reconnection with hope and disappointment

Is she there does she love me

Did the world survive my rest

Of course all is there and myth or truth may be found

Bound in the ones and zeroes

Enough

Elixir is necessary

A pattern mundane

Dump the old: I really must wash those now dirtier dishes

Open the lid: I again forgot to get the filter from the cupboard above

Dump the old: I really must take the trash out today

Close the lid open cupboard get filter close cupboard open lid

Pour water to six cups, three to me

What place has such tiny cups?

Plug the grinder: two thirds beans plus ten for flavour
Elementary, and I smile my mundane

I hope I am not waking the neighbour

The grinder motor is failing

Electric scents motive olfactory

Dump: switch to red, I need to buy beans and filters

The wafts of nations far from me

Grinds of sweat and soil and growth

And burlap and donkeys and Juan Valdez

They enter my mundane

Grateful I am alive

Grateful she loves me

Grateful relaxed

Cherry pie and a cuppa joe Shelley

Cooper wakes

Get a life mister

I smile my mundane

And change

Sadly Felt Perfunctory

A rush of wind greets at the door

Disjointed thoughts meet disconnected dots

One mind wants connection

Another struggles to keep up

A lull in the hurricane does not see eye to eye

And the leaf is lifted to the sky

The gale force of personality leaves to fall

Left in failure once again

Unthinking, no idea

Automatic, was thought to do right

Mechanical, what spark was missed

Dutiful, to the end

Yet thoughtful unnoticed, in the void of corporeal

A beautiful mind wounded by rain

Sinking away

Unfulfilled requiem

Elegy incapable

A pap of thoughtless left

To dwell in lamentation

A constant failing

The fall

An end again

Lovers Us Together

There are words unspoken in this silent embrace

Your hand in graceful arc up and around my head

Rustling my hair, playing about my neck and ears

Your hair tickles, my nose breathing you deeply

Hands cupped to your breast in joyful memory

We rise together, knowing our wanton

I lift you easily carrying you to our bed

The kiss, the knowing

A taste of petals parted rising to meet in urgent need

We part to enter and join a couple loved

Like no other known.

Eyes locked in tune only to close at each crescendo

The music sweet

A love song

As old as humanity

As new as life

Ours

Providence Destinies

What will it be contestant?

Prize package #1: uncertain love with love given

Prize package #2: certain love with love given

Oooorrrr…

Prize package #3: a lifetime of shallow you-ness……………………. in your new car!!! (ding ding ding ding ding)  This brand new Rendezvous comes with oil injection, a chassis that won’t quit, is a Hummer of a gas guzzler, a shiny stick shift, under the hood performance, and a rear end that cannot be beat.  She is a quick responder with a short shallow uncertain performance record.

Contestant, time to choose your prize destiny

Audience please help our contestant

Will it be Door #1, Door #2 or Door #3

Choice will be made right after this word…

Do you have faith, the faith ground from a lifetime of experience?  Are you prepared to make your future a reality?  Are you given to making choices on fact, on faith, or on fact and faith.  We can help.  We are Providence.  Our choices are your choices because we know it all.  We take away your free will and replace it with only the facts.  Your informed decision will eliminate destiny and instead provide you with the humdrum reality of living a life of ifs.  Want a sure thing, we guarantee it.  Want free will, we will guarantee only that you are in for one helluva ride, hold on, and keep your hands, feet, and head inside the car.

What will it be contestant?

Will it be Door #1, Door #2 or Door #3

Audience: 1, no 2, 1, 3, 2, 2, 3

It will be none Bob.

I am stepping out of your game

And into my living.

This land of influence

Of audience pressure

Of pretty girls

And shiny things

These are dead to my free will

Bob my choice is made

I choose; I have chosen.

Connection is the most cherished thing this being will have.

With a friend, you need never be alone